these are the letters that love wrote {love letters}

i am adding another fixture to the blog!  i have decided to write a love letter to my kids each week. not all of them every week, although there is plenty enough material, but each of them in their turn. i want to write them my love in hopes of immortalizing something.  how they inspired, how they convicted, how they changed me forever.  i don't ever want them forget how fiercely they are loved, chocolate smeared face & all.  i don't think i could ever quite accurately articulate just how much i love them.  but it's worth a try.
and so, these are the letters that love wrote.

lessons in the losses: swimsuits & stretchmarks

lesson in the losses #4: my body is more than an awkward swimsuit filler

swimsuit season is upon us. summer has arrived. the ritual has begun - squeezing three little bodies into teeny tiny swimsuits. little swim shorts brush just above the ankles, blonde hair turned invisible by water & sun, little white bum tan lines, excited little hands splash & squeal delight.

their little sun kissed patoots next to my not-so-little patoot. and it makes me proud.

because of this body of mine, which cannot seem to squeezing into any flattering shape of a bathing suit, that i birthed three beautiful children. this amazing body of mine, stretched and creased in all the wrong places, housed three sets of flailing limbs, three bony bums, three enormous heads... now making four. this body of mine, flabby where others are tight & toned, carried the miracle of life. i grew it within my womb, i nourished it with the sacrifice of love... i grew three, soon to be four, gorgeously healthy & strong children... and there is no shame in that, no need for insecurity or embarrassment.

so take that swimsuit season... i am proud to bear the marks of life, the badges of honor, that make me a mother to three, very soon to be four, gorgeous babies. there is nothing more beautiful than that. my body is so much more than swimsuit filler, so very much more.

and then there were four...!

and so... we're pregnant! by october we will have four beautiful children age 2 and under! and we are absolutely thrilled to bits!

although i've been quite sick (hence the break in blogging), i just couldn't be happier! it is so strange with this being my fourth child that i could be this excited. you'd think i'd be used to it by now... but i guess you never get too used to miracles! some people may think we're crazy but i just feel so blessed. i know there will be challenges, but i am full of expectation, faith and adventure!

God is SO good!

a name is a name

i have loved naming all our kids - sometimes i wish we had 20 kids just because there are so many good names out there! my husband disagrees... with the 20 kids part!

but i have often heard it said that a name is a name which sounds just so uninspired. one of the first verses i memorized to speak over davith after he was born was isaiah 19:19 "i and the children the lord has given me have names that reveal the plans god almighty has for his people." And with that as my inspiration, let me introduce our three children...

davith benjamin "beloved son of the right hand": we love this name because it speak of the rich inheritance we have as god's beloved. davith is the welsh form of david. we have continually drawn life from the story of david in the bible as someone who ran to the battle line and worshipped god without abandon. this fits davith perfectly and is right in line with a prophetic word over his life about him being 'one that will go further'.

micaiah john emeth (kai) "who is like god? grace & truth, rejoice": there is a passage in revelations that talks about the pillars on either sides of god's thrown being grace and truth which i think is a perfect picture - the embrace of grace & sword of truth side by side. such an excellent cause to rejoice! he has been so gentle from the start rotating between crooked little grins and a furrowed brow. even his cry is gentle (well, at least compared to eva's). he will a quiet but bold strength, a strong but gentle man of god filled with deep wisdom.

eva joy nouvelle "new life & joy": well that one really speaks for herself. even in the womb, anytime we felt uncertain about the twins health, this feisty little girl would get all riled up, pole vaulting off my poor hips! her smile lights up her entire face. she will be an excellent testimony to what a new creation and new joy really is.

watch out world! here they come!