the clammer & the quiet {letters to livi}

you are totally at home in the noise, in the chaos, in the clutter of your older siblings.  crumpled laundry often lines the end of your bed, a gift from your older sister.  but you don't mind.  your diapers often stolen for someone's dolly, your susu's borrowed by your brothers, your blankets paraded around the house as a cape or fashionable scarf.  but you remain undisturbed.  drums, whistles, giggles & shrieks shred the silence of your nap.  but you sleep deeper, harder when you know we are there.  when i finally lay you in your basinet in a quiet corner upstairs, away from the clammer, you cry unconsolable for the others.  you are soothed by the sounds of life & long for the company while you dream.
but my dear sweet livi, the time has come for you to slip into restfulness all on your own.  soon you will learn the life long lesson your mama is still learning.  sweet solitary is a gift.  soul soothing salve is the quiet, if you let it.  there are things you can only hear in the silence.  things you can only think in the quiet.  but don't fret your little furrowed brow... for you are never actually ever alone.  there is the One who fills the stillness, who whispers in the wilderness.  He is always alongside, always listening, always speaking.  and remember, just because you seem alone, doesn't mean you have to be lonesome.  there are many others who are cheering you on, even when you can't see them.  like the great crowd of witnesses or your mama... ever praying, ever cheering, ever there.

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