eye to eye, soul to soul

 eyes speak louder than words.  with one glance, a child experiences how a parent is experiencing them. he can tell by your eyes whether he is invisible.  whether he is truly accepted & valued.  whether you are pleased or disappointed with him. he can see your heart through your eyes. do your eyes light up when he comes into the room?  or is that ever critical eye searching for something to fix, something to mend, something to straighten? a loose thread, a peanut butter smudged cheek, a cowlick perhaps is where the eye might land.  i think i am showing them i love them.  i think i am showing them i care.  but what my eyes have been teaching them is how to be a subject of criticism.  the windows of my soul have needed some cleaning, some clarifying, some focus.  to express how i really feel about my love ones.
"one of the most powerful body language tools that a human being has is one of the subtlest movements we can make - eye contact." - tristan lee
do i see them when they enter a room? does my body language reflect how precious they are?  how dearly they are loved & wanted? how much they matter? it validates the soul to see someone.  to truly see.  to acknowledge their being.  to make contact with my eyes all aglow, all invigorated just by their presence. 
i have heard it said that the first point of disconnection in a marriage is eye contact.  when you become so preoccupied with life, hustling in & out of the house, drudging grocery bags in from the car & hanging up coats, mumbling the standard, 'hi hun. how was your day?' while rummaging through drawers, one can easily forget to make eye contact.  to see the other person.  to truly engage eye to eye, soul to soul.   eye contact can change the entire dynamic of any relationship.  
there is a verse in the bible that says "i will instruct you & teach you in the way you should go; i will guide you with my eye upon you" {psalm 32:8}.  it is not with the eye of punishment that the Father guides us. nor does He have a critical or perfectionist eye.  but it is with the eye of Love that He captures our hearts.  that He sees into our souls & validates our being.  and that is how i want to relate to my spouse, to my children, to those i love. looking eye to eye, soul to soul. to take my attention off of what is in front of me & put it all towards the one i love. to show them with my eyes, that they light up my soul every time they come near. 
that has been one of my greatest revelations as a parent. that more than obedience, more than compliance or good behaviour is my heart-to-heart connection with my child.  if i can guide my children with my eye, with all that is in my heart, than i have succeeded. to be able to have them look into my eyes, see my heart & change their decision to protect my heart because they value our relationship. when i can inspire them & empower them with the substance of our loving relationship then i have become a little more like the Father.
and it is the same with any relationship, in the end, we are all looking for the same thing...
to be seen & validated.
*this is a small fragment of a larger revelation that God has been unfolding in my life over the past year.  i am not so sure if what i have written makes sense without the greater context but such is the challenge of blogging, parcelling large chunks of soul into small bite sized packages.  i am still on a sharp learning curve when it comes to writing, and becoming the competent, concise writer i know i can be, instead of the blubbering, anthology of incomplete thoughts which i feel i wander into all too often.  writing is a journey, just like anything else & i am glad to be on this journey with you. :)


  1. beautiful Sarah, and I agree. -B